The Blindspot of “High Positivity”

I’ve been reflecting on the concept of positivity a lot this week in light of the news about Twitch (someone celebrated for his positivity and tendency to uplift others). I’ve always been a naturally pretty optimistic person. I have positivity in my top 5 for my CliftonStrengths and I generally wake up in a good mood - a weird detail but my resting state is pretty positive in the mornings (unless it’s a 5:10 am alarm clock when I was teaching, in which case I was NOT in a good mood). Though I often struggled with a fierce inner critic coming of age, I’ve always been pretty authentically positive in terms of how I move around in the world and interact with others. It just flows for me. Part of why I believe I’ve been successful as a strengths coach is because I am naturally asset-minded about lifting other people up.

But one of the costs/blind spots of this strength is that I’m incredible uncomfortable and resistant to expressing negative feelings. I tend to keep everything in and withhold expressing negative emotions because I don’t want to upset other people or ruffle any feathers. I often feel pulled to pursue the most harmonious route to avoid conflict.

As you can imagine, this doesn’t *actually* lead to more harmony in long run. I guess if I have any intention for 2023, it’s to take more small steps towards cultivating a more comfortable relationship with expressing my emotions that aren’t positive - directly, honestly, and freely - and trust that other people can not only handle it but might actually might welcome it, too.